|
|
| SAAGAR | |||||||||||||||||
|
|
| ||||||||||||||||
| CHAPTER ONE : REVALATIONS | |||||||||||||||||
|
Saagar By E.M.Hamilton Chapter one: Revelations Pause for thought:’some things are better left unsaid, but some, have to be said out. Usually It's the same thing, but with a different perspective' Disclaimers: Sex: There are quite a few adult themes decimated in this story, if this offends you, you should get a life. If you are under the age of consent you should print this up and get you're English teacher to use it as a class text. Language: this contains fairly explicit language if you are likely to be offended by this then don't continue. All the characters of this story and It's plot are owned by E M Hamilton, anyone carrying out infringement of any kind on it's contents will be prosecuted... Basically this story is not for the light-hearted. Now that that's out of the way I hope you enjoy, this is my first attempt at any sort of gay fanfiction so feedback is highly favourable. Inspiration: 1) A friend of a friend who recently confessed her love for another woman, her first woman and received a positive result. Both of them straight before they fell for each other ‘aaaahhhhh that’s sweet'. 2) A good friend who always makes me read fanfiction that after she's read it and explained intricate details about it to me, a spoiler basically, but anyway thanks to her, for just being there. 3) Repeat play of 'What would happen if we kissed' by Meredith Brooks. The Uni. bar as any other afternoon was filled with its students laughing and drinking. The air drenched in cigarette smoke and the light whiff of alcohol, the freshmen’s lined up against the doors. The geeks huddled in intellectual accord just outside and all of the jocks surrounding the pool table each of them taking their final bets before Zoë attempted to clear the last remaining balls with a single shot. Most of the guys doubted her ability to do so, but Maggie had seen her do just that many times before. Maggie pulled out her bardic hand and placed a fifty-dollar bill in the centre of the table with a grin painted across her face. A grin so obvious that if the others looked hard enough at it they would realise, it gave away everything that would be resulting soon enough. Zoë had it all calculated, it wasn't just a fluke. She was a woman of science and had every angle counted for. Maggie knew this, and doubting her friend would be a sin in itself. As the taller woman pulled the cue back Maggie gently squeezed Zoe's shoulder in one final reassurement. One by one each ball fell comfortably into its pocket Zoë knew she had done it again. Her medical degree didn't give her much time for a college job, but this was one sure way to make quick money. Maggie turned to smile at her friend, as the final black ball tumbled down in Zoe's glory, she quickly grabbed the dollar bills off of the table and flew into Zoe's arms almost thrusting the medic's six foot frame crashing to the floor. "You did it!" "Whoa Mags," Zoë screeched as she held her younger friend who was jumping for joy. She smiled long and hard down at her, knowing already that she would win, as did Maggie, but it always surprised Zoë how excited Maggie would get at a moment like this. "You knew that we would!" "I always know" The smaller woman pouted, stepping back with fake pride. "You only win because of me anyway!" She laughed. Zoë had to laugh to that. Maggie had a way with words and anyone who had never seen the Medic shoot pool before was a sure sucker to bet against her. All because of the words said by the smaller woman, of course. This way the winnings were far higher. Zoë ran her fingers through her dark hair as she turned to give the crowd of guys round the table one final triumphant look. They knew when they had met their match, and Zoë was most definitely it. A couple of low mumbles and moans came in her reply, but no one actually said a word they just turned and walked away from the table in shame. Zoë felt eye's upon her, someone else was looking at her and then her gaze caught someone who she had never noticed before in the far corner. He stood a staggering height quite similar to her own with short cropped honey hair, which slightly waved over his chiselled features. He attempted to brush it away when noticing Zoe's returned stare upon him, and smiled casually as if to say he wasn't impressed by the recent display of shooting. Maggie turned to see what her friend had been encaptured by, when no reply came to her ramblings. "Guy!" she called over with a wave when she recognised the object of Zoe's interest. Guy strode slowly over, which brought an almost unreadable smile to Zoe's face, but Maggie could read it, she would rather have not read it, but she could. "Guy," Maggie started waving her hand at him "this is a very good friend of mine, Zoë. She's currently a 3rd year medic!" Zoë now broadly smiled. She felt like she was thirteen again, incapable of controlling any emotion. "Zoë, this is Guy." Zoë nodded stupidly. "He's here for his final year of psychology from England… and I don't actually know that much about him." Maggie smiled and waited as neither took any action on her introductions. "So say hello at least." She was surprised at both of them. "Oh, I'm sorry," Guy turned to gaze straight at Zoë and held out his hand. "Hello," his English accent easily recognisable. He had a heavy deep voice, like that which is achieved after years of Jack Daniel’s, but it suited the accent wonderfully. And Zoë just continued to smile. Zoe's hands were sweaty and she quickly rubbed them against her pale blue Levi’s' before offering one to Guy. He laughed slightly at that, which made Maggie smile too. "So.... Zoë," Maggie turned to Zoë who had phased out in a private world all her own. Maggie waved her hands around to get some attention. "Planet Earth to Zoë...are you reading us?" Guy joined in waving his hands around. Like some stupid game they tried to reach wherever the medic had gone and was trying to bring her back. "Huh! What?" Zoë looked a little stifled and confused. Both Guy and Maggie laughed together as they saw her come around. "Nothing," Guy grinned. "I wouldn't worry about it too much." "I'm sorry!" Zoë shrugged trying hard to think of an excuse for why she just phased out into thoughts of Guy psycho analysing her. Oh god, she thought, she had phased out again. He must be psycho analysing her now, and thinking she was a complete jerk! At that moment she was glad that Maggie was there in the real world with Guy, she would know how to explain it to him, she always knew what to say. "So Guy?" Zoë started after she had regained some self composure again. "Since I've just come into some money, how about I treat all of us to a round of drinks?" That was the smartest thing she had said all afternoon, she thought to her self. Hoping for a positive answer from the charming man. "Thanks," he accepted and all three of them made their way to the bar. The hours passed like minutes as they sat talking and drinking. Getting to know each other a little better and just building a friendship. "Oh god!" Zoë jumped up "It's past eleven, I'm really sorry guy's I really have to get home" She looked thoroughly worried, as she headed towards the door. "Wait up Zoë," Maggie called. "I'll walk you home." She grabbed her things and looked over at Guy. Was this guy for real? First he drops all the right hints towards Zoë and now he gives up. "Oh yeah" he gasped. "Hold on...I'll join you." Both of them followed.... The air outside was exceptionally cold for California that time of the year. As the breeze blew through Zoe’s raven black hair, she clenched her shoulders and realized that she had left her coat at the bar. Did she have time to go back? She imagined her father's face when she would get home, the temper tantrums, shouting and cursing. She didn't blame him for his moods. He had lost everything when he had lost his job a few years back. He was a kind man at heart, but his drinking had changed him, and since mom left, things just got worse. She was all he had left, he relied on her. The last thing she wanted to do was to disobey or let him down. Maggie ran ahead of Guy to catch up with Zoë. "Hey… You nearly forgot your coat," she gasped out of breath. "I'm surprised you didn't notice, it's freezing out here," she said as she helped her friend on with her coat. Zoe's heart lit up with Maggie's concerned gestures. "Thanks" Zoë managed, trying not to slow that pace of the walk too much. "You okay?" Maggie asked, in genuine concern. Zoë let out a little smirk as appreciation, which was enough to ease any thoughts on Maggie's mind. She knew of Zoe's problems at home, they never really talked about them, the bard had never wanted to make her friend uncomfortable at any time. She could never bear to see her friend in any pain, and knew how difficult it was for her to talk about her feelings. Even though Maggie was much weaker and smaller in size than her friend, when she saw Zoë like this she felt protective of her. She wished she could end the pain, she wished the taller woman would share her pain, and then her strength. Maggie's feelings for Zoë ran deep, but it was plain to see that there would never be a return of those feelings from her. Why did she introduce Guy to Zoë? She silently scorned herself for that act, but the truth remained that she knew why. Maggie's heart was pure. She wanted anything that would make Zoë happy, just because she would never receive love from the one she cared for didn't mean that Zoë shouldn't either. Would she be able to bear seeing her Zoë with another? All her thoughts now were put to seeing her friend happy and if that meant getting her and Guy together, then she would. Guy caught up finally "Hey... mind if I walk you home?" he grinned. Zoë didn't reply. "No… Of course she doesn't," Maggie intervened, as she slightly elbowed Zoë in the ribs. "Oh... no I mean sure." The medic replied with the aided gesture from the bard. Maggie left them to it and returned back towards her own apartment at the college campus. "Zoë, that was quite a bit of shooting today!" Guy finally started after a few moments of silence. 'Thanks,' Zoë wasn't quite sure what to say. She was great with her male friends. In fact, most of her friends were guys, but she had never had too much luck in the personal department. She had always been a bit of a tomboy, but that didn’t really mean anything she guessed... and when it came down to words she had come to rely on Maggie a bit. What with her being the English student and everything. Oh no, she had phased out again. "So Guy where are you staying?" Zoë asked staring straight at the floor. She decided that living arrangements was a friendly enough conversation to start from. "At the campus." Guy answered and then paused before asking a question of his own "Um... I hope you don't mind me asking, but I found it strange that you're staying at home?" he wasn't sure if he should have asked, but his curiosity took the better of him. "Well… I live amazingly near and it would just cost me money that I really don't have," she smiled "and I really need to be with my dad... he kinda needs me" she stammered. Trying to answer the question as simply as she could. "Oh!" was his only reply. Still not understanding, but knowing that the body language of his companion let on that she was uncomfortable with the subject. So he decided to drop it. "I know this might be a bit sudden," he decided to change the conversation completely "but would you like to come out to... lunch with me tomorrow?" Zoë stopped 'Yesss!!!!! ' She thought, he asked, so that meant she wouldn't have to. "Yeah, that sounds great!" and gods did it. " I'll meet you at one in the bar!" He nodded and smiled in comprehension. "Well I live here," Zoë stopped outside her small three-bedroom home. "Goodnight." Guy whispered as he leaned over to peck Zoë on the cheek with a light kiss. Zoë turned to her home and waved goodbye from the doorstep. Things she thought seemed to be finally going her way. Maggie collapsed on her bed. Thoughts round out with Zoë. What was she going to do? She had been friends with Zoë for almost three years, and loved her more than a friend just as long, had she fallen in love with Zoë? The day that she set eyes upon the beautiful medic. She could not remember when she had realised that her feelings for Zoë were beyond friendship, but they were. Now those feelings were destroying her. She wanted to ring up Zoë, to talk to her just to hear her voice, but was afraid. Her emotions were in turmoil with herself, every touch every smile, it meant the world to her. From being in her embrace when they won the pool game, to brushing away her hair while helping her on with her coat. Maggie had never had a successful relationship with a woman before, and had never felt so drawn to anyone in all her life. Zoë it seemed was the only one. To her she wouldn't have cared for sex, race caste or creed she was still Zoë and Maggie would love her. It was the beauty beyond the physical being she craved and ached for. She had to clear her mind or her thoughts would drive her insane. What would Oprah say in a time like this? Oh of course 'meditate and journalate'. She would write it all out, that had to help. Good old Oprah to the rescue. Just as she sat down at her table there was a knock at the door. "Come in," she called deceiving her heart and despite really wanting to be alone. Slowly a tall lean man with slight stubble and uncontrollable hair peered round the door. "Hey Maggie you gotta a sec?" His fingers gripping the door like a bird. "Yeah sure Screetch come on in," The last thing she needed to hear was Screetch whining about his so-called problems, but she waved him in anyway. He sat down on the bed as Maggie swirled her chair round from the table to face him. Her face clearly was showing deep thoughts and confusion. "Penny for your thoughts?" Screetch smirked his eyes searching to find Maggie’s, but she avoided his gaze. She knew Screetch meant well and his heart was in the right place, but she didn't answer. Screetch realised that whatever was on Maggie's mind was not up for discussion, so he started his tale of all that had gone wrong that day. Maggie tried to listen, but her mind was somewhere else as well as her heart and soul. "Oh damn," Maggie yelled out as the sun seeped through her window on to her bed. It was after 10'clock. Maggie rushed out of bed, splashing water on to her face and throwing her clothes on. She was late again.... Her lecture was half an hour ago, and she didn't get round to doing the assignment in all of last evening's events. She just wasn't a morning person she thought to herself, as she heard her stomach grumble with a complaint of its own. She hadn't eaten anything since yesterday lunch. Well, she didn't have time for food now. The bard ran straight into the main foyer, still tying her hair up and adjusting her top. "Maggie?" she turned to the familiar voice, and stopped her racing. "Morning Zoë." she yawned, turning around to face the owner of that sweet voice, but still walking. "Hungry?" The medic quirked. Zoë knew that Maggie would be, and handed over a croissant and a cup of hot cappuccino. "Whoa…" the bard felt a little spill on her hand "Thanks, you're amazing you know that?" Maggie leapt in for a hug. Anything was a good enough excuse for that. As she pulled away she noticed a deep red lash against Zoe's neck. She quickly handed the food back to Zoë, and pulled away the hair from her neck, in concern "What happened?" Maggie asked while stroking the reddened skin, which was still seeping blood. "It's nothing!" Zoë lied looking down at the floor, avoiding any confrontation with Maggie. The bard felt around the scar, this was most definitely not 'nothing.' "Hey... have you two finally come out and started making out in public now?" Maggie and Zoë both turned, it was Chris. "Wow...you look so cute together!" The offensive woman continued. 'So fuck me!' Zoë shouted back. "No thanks!" Chris waved back while smirking past. "You fucking dykes are alright without me!" Zoë realised what she had said and cursed herself inwardly for such a flaw of words. "Forget her!" Maggie reassured, as she turned her gaze back to her friend. There was a brief chilling silence between them before Maggie realised this was just Zoe's way to avoid the real issue that needed to be tackled here. "Zoë?" Maggie broke the numbness "We really have to talk about this, c'mmon". Maggie grabbed the taller woman by the wrist and dragged her out of the campus. They walked together without words for a while, until they reached the fountain, where Maggie sat Zoë down and crouched down beside her. Staring deep into her face for answers, she had already silently asked the questions she needed, but voiced them for Zoe's sake anyway. Why did Zoë lock all of her emotions up like that, why did she have to built this wall up against her, why did she always have to try to be so strong? 'Zoë… what happened to you're neck' Maggie tried again. 'Nothing, I fell down the stairs' the medic lied miserably. Maggie knew she was lying and she also knew the truth. "It was you're father wasn't it?" It had to be asked… Zoe's last thread of strength snapped at that, as a tear that had been welling in her eyes since the night before finally fell freely. "He saw me with Guy yesterday, and I… I don't know what he thought, but..." the words slowly stuttering from her lips. "Sshhhh" Maggie raised her finger to Zoe's lips, her heart pounding at the feel and more at the sight of the woman she loved in such pain. She sat down next to her and held out her arms into which Zoë fell freely into. "It's okay." she coaxed "Zoë, you don't have to put up with it!" She could feel her anger building up inside of her, bottling and filling up against Zoë father. She... She wanted to drag him out in the street and expose him for the fucking arshole that he was, but she couldn't and she couldn’t for the one person in the world that she cared for truly… for Zoe's sake. The paradox was amazing, on one hand Zoë was getting hurt and if she stopped the medics father then the suffering would be over. But on the other hand if Maggie ever really tried to stop him, then Zoë would be shattered. “I know, but he just needs a little more time, and I'm all he's got" Zoë pleaded with Maggie's words and herself. She knew she would have to something about this, but he just needed more time. Zoë remained silent encradled in Maggie's warm embrace for the next half-hour or so. Here she felt protected, Maggie was one of the few people if not the only that she felt safe with, she had grown to depend on her for so much throughout their friendship. Maggie met up with Screetch and Darlene as they walked together to the bar, their usual meeting place for lunch most days. She was surprised to see Zoë there already, as she was almost always late. "So where do you wanna go for lunch today?" Darlene asked. "Oh, I'm sorry I told Guy I'd meet him for lunch," Zoë added a little apologetically, but with some happiness too. Maggie's heart sank, and it was clear from her face, she hoped that no one saw that particular reflex expression, but Darlene had, and for that Maggie knew that she would be interrogated later. "Oh yeah!" Screetch inquired "Who's this Guy then?" "Just some Guy!" Zoë avoided the topic jokingly. "Okay... well you have fun and remember to fill us in later" Screetch added. " I guess we'll see you later on?" he waved back as the crowd left Zoë in her wait. Maggie's heart was reluctant to leave, but she knew that she had to for Zoe's sake, if not her own sanity. As Maggie was lying in the dark, starting at the ceiling, as she noticed the intricacies in which the patterns in the paint swirled into each other. She couldn't tell where one colour had started and another met or ended. The Art students had done all the rooms the year before as major projects, and she'd never really noticed until today. Her mind was unable to think of her college studies, or really think about anything apart from Zoë for longer than 5mins. There was a wrap at the door as Darlene made her way in. "Don't you ever wait for permission before you enter?" Maggie retorted still looking at the ceiling. "Sorry, but I wanted to see you in your natural form," Darlene mused. "Oh yeah… I forgot you're another crazy psychologist, but tell me this, what if I was naked huh… then what?" Maggie just wanted the conversation to linger, avoiding the real thing that Darlene had come to talk about. "Well I'd count myself lucky!" Darlene smirked Maggie raised an eyebrow. "As a very promiscuous and sexually active lesbian that is," Darlene continued "and what do you mean ANOTHER crazy psychologist? Guy's alright" Darlene tested. Maggie’s words were out before she could think 'Yeah he's great!" the bard glommed sarcastically. She knew once the words were out that she had fallen in for Darlene's trap. Maggie immediately admitted that the other crazy psychologist was Guy. Thinking of quick escape from the arriving topic. "And anyway you're a lesbian with a loving partner, and if you keep this up then I might be having a bit of a chat with her later!" Maggie joked. Darlene gave Maggie a look of understanding and whispered one word that said it all 'Zoë?" All that Maggie could do in return was dumbly nod her head. She and Darlene had talked about her feelings towards Zoë long ago, and it was together that they had made the decision that Maggie could not confess her love to Zoë for the sake of their friendship. "Darlene, I can't keep it up any longer... I'm going to go nuts" She flung herself up from the bed to sit down. Darlene kneeled down next to her, and placed a compassionate hand on her shoulder. "I feel like I could explode any moment. I love her with all my heart, but when I see her I can't say anything, and I don't want to. I just want to enjoy every moment together and make her happy. And now there's this... this stupid Guy. What am I supposed to do?" RING RING. It was Maggie’s cellular. "Oh well, I guess you're saved by the bell," Darlene smirked. Maggie's facial expressions changed from confused to troubled and almost shattered during the phone call. After almost seconds she slammed down the phone, grabbed her jacket and ran out without another word. "What's wrong? Who was it Mags?" Darlene called as she raced after the storming woman. Maggie's face had paled. "It was Zoë, something’s wrong. I've gotta get to her." She carried on running as fast as she could, not stopping for thought or breath. She reached Zoe's home and slammed her fists against the door. She could hear someone approaching, as the door slowly opened, Maggie flung it open with all her might, and raced past Zoe's towering father, straight to Zoe's room. She found her friend sitting in darkness crying at the night sky. "C'mmon Zoë you're not staying in this house a moment longer! she grabbed the bards hand, forcing her up to her feet, but Zoë resisted. "No, Zoë I'm not letting you stay in this shit-hole with that.... HIM a minute longer, I can't bear to see him hurt you every time he spends all of his state allowance on booze instead of on you, and I can't just watch when he hurts you, and I cant bear it... It’s not fair, Please come with me Zoë?" Maggie pleaded. "Please?" Zoë stopped for a moment thinking it through, she knew Maggie was right. It was now or never. Like a bolt of realization splayed through her mind... She got up brushed away her tears grabbed her bag and tossed in some clothes, books and all of her money. She held tight on to Maggie's hand and followed her out of the house. "I'm going" she yelled back, not turning, afraid to see her fathers face, She didn’t dare or want or even need to say any more. The man had been so dumbstruck with the pure courage that had suddenly been awoken in his daughter. He was frozen to his state still standing by the door. She sighed a breath of relief she had done it, she had finally done it. She felt a wave of freedom pass over her, as she strode back to the campus hand in hand with her best friend. "Now what?" Zoë smiled as she settled onto Maggie's bed. "What do you mean?" Maggie looked up inquisitively from removing her shoes. "Now you go to sleep" "No.... I mean, how am I going to live?" The medic’s voice began to crack. "With me, you can play heaps of pool and pay half the rent, and as far as sleeping, well you can sleep on the bed and I'll sleep down here." Maggie knew she would do go crazy if she had to share a bed with Zoë. "No way! " the medic blurted out a little too fast. "If anyone sleeps on the floor it's going to be me, this is you're apartment." Zoë protested. "Not if you're paying half the rent it's not," Maggie corrected her. "Well in that case we can share. It's settled." Zoë had put an end to it right there and Maggie couldn't argue. The honey haired woman switched the light off and slipped into the bathroom to get changed. When she walked out, Zoë was still in the process of putting her nightwear on. The curtains were open and the moonlight beamed through the window onto Zoe's form. The trinkets of light hitting her golden soft skin like pearls, forcing Maggie to blush in awe. She had never really known how beautiful Zoë was until tonight, and she knew that this vision and thought would haunt her awake for many nights to come. Zoe's beautiful raven hair caressed the tip of her shoulder, with a few locks falling onto her face. That face, how Maggie loved that face... those high cheekbones and moulded features, and of course those brilliant blue eyes... like blazing diamonds priceless and perfect in every way. Sleep did not come quickly as they both lay still, emerged in their own thoughts, but when it did it was well deserved and deep. "Hey sleepy head get up…" Zoë called out. "It's nearly nine." The shorter woman rolled around in the sheets trying to cover her eyes from the light. "Tell me when it is nine okay, I'll get up then," she muffled. "I got you some cappuccino and breakfast, if that makes a difference." Zoë knew that it would. If anything was Maggie's weakness apart from a good read, was food. The sleepy bard managed to scramble herself out of the bed, and looked up into Zoe's deep blue eyed. It was the sight that she wanted to wake up to every morning for the rest of her life. They brought an uncontrollable ear to ear stupid grin to her face, as she took the offered food. 'Fanks..' was all that she managed from her piled up mouth trying to fit an entire hot cross bun in one go. Maggie noticed that Zoë was completely ready and dressed, while she on the hand was still lounging around in her long T-shirt. The room looked a little more organised too. Zoë had already sorted out her books and cleared out Maggie's while she was at it. "Whoa… This place looks really great!" Maggie muffled "Thanks, and I didn't know you were so good in the tidy up department." "Don't go telling the world okay?" Zoë grinned, "You'd kill my rep." They both laughed together. There was a knock on the door and Darlene entered "Welcome to our humble hole," she overacted out while curtsying at Zoë. Screetch was soon to follow in, one by one handing each of the ladies a rose and blowing a kiss. "What is this you, guy's?" Maggie inquired Screetch decided to explain himself first "Well it's a welcome to Zoë, and I just felt like saying I love you all " His eyebrows raised in Maggie's direction for the later part of the statement. "How did you guy's know I moved in?" Zoë asked still in a cheerful mood. "This is Uni. Babe’s... here we're worse than a village. Always remember everyone knows everything!" Darlene smiled. But then realised her words and gave that taller raven-haired woman an apologetic look. Chris entered which followed a brief silence, "What?" she asked sarcastically "Aren’t I welcome into your little gang bang?" Her intentions of hatred towards them clearly visible. "What do you want?" Zoë finally asserted. "Nothing from you.... Okay the attendant wants to know what the hell you guys are doing with all you’re SLEEPING ARRANGEMENTS, I think someone told him about the little sleepover." She gave a wicked a glance. "Three dykes and a dork as if that could be hard to miss," she added and pranced right out. "What is her fucking problem?" Zoë asked rhetorically. The mood was no longer light and cheerful, and Zoë didn't suddenly feel so good. "Well we'll see you guy's at lunch okay," Darlene smiled. As she and Screetch left, Zoë gave Maggie a smirk. "What was that for?" Maggie asked. "Well I think that.... Um well Screetch has a thing for you" The medic answered. Maggie thought it to be horrifically ironic how Zoë could sense the love that Screetch had for Maggie, yet was unable to detect a hint of the love that she had for Zoë. Maggie accepted it as her fate, and shook the thought from her mind as she decided she would enjoy every moment she had with Zoë even if it was as her friend. Then Zoe's expression changed, Maggie looked up to see Guy standing by her door, a disturbing look, clearly upon his face. "Hey," he managed. Zoë gazed straight at him, but said nothing. Her expression still and unreadable. Maggie cleared her throat. What was it with morning calls today, was the whole campus gonna come down and say hi? "Okay… I guess I'll leave you two to it," she had to slip away she decided, while trying to fake a smile towards Zoë. "No!" Zoë retorted while throwing up her hand in a halt. "What ever Guy has to say you don't have to leave." Maggie didn't understand. Zoë sounded upset and almost angry, the looks of confusion clear upon her face, as she suddenly froze in her steps. "I'm really sorry Zoë!" Guy started, not happy with the situation, but still willing to talk. "It's just that something turned up... and," he stifled on his words. "I promise to make it up to you… please?" A look of regret and guilt on his face. "I just need one more chance." His deep green eyes pleading with Zoe's cold ice blue. Slowly her expression changed slightly, to a more tolerable look. "Just meet me for dinner tonight, and if you still feel the same way, I'll never bother you again.... I promise… Please?” Zoë felt a strange pull towards Guy it was his hair she thought, the golden soft curls, and his deep green eyes. Everyone deserved a second chance, it was all that she had truly learnt in the past and so nodded slightly. “Meet me here at eight." Guy couldn't hide his happiness, and gave a full toothed grin as he almost jumped out of the room. As soon as he left Zoë turned to Maggie apologetically. "I'm sorry… I wanted to tell you, but things were just crazy yesterday." Her eyes searching for some sort of sign in Maggie's face, but saw nothing. Maggie thought about her course of action, she was angry for Zoë not telling her what had happened, but also understoo d. If she was angry with anyone then it was Guy, what gave him the right to stand Zoë up? "It's okay," she waved her hands around jokingly. "I'm only you're best friend after all," she added sarcastically, with a slight look of hurt. Zoë turned her friend to face her, her eyes full of remorse and placed her hands on Maggie's shoulders. The touch sending a wave of electricity through the medic's body, forcing her eyes closed, her mind filled with the vision of Zoë in he moonlight. "It's okay," she smiled her heart crying tears of blood, but her words defied every true emotion. Maggie avoided going back to her apartment that evening. She didn't want to be there when Guy came round to pick up Zoë. She just sat around in the bar after her work shift, but then decided that there was a chance that Zoë may turn up there. So she made her way to another bar that she and Zoë went to often, and decided that a couple of drinks were in order to drown her sorrows. "Thanks" Guy smiled "for giving me another chance" after they had finished dinner, and casually strolling in the cool night. He was trying hard to keep it fairly slow, but he knew that if he didn't taste the dark haired beauty before him soon, he would go nuts. He thought he would slip in the hint to going back to his room soon enough. "So what would you like to do now?" He asked with a deep smile. "How about we get a drink?" Zoë suggested, Guy's face lit up "You got anywhere particular in mind?" he added not really expecting a reply. This would be the perfect opportunity to get to take Zoë home. Thoughts whizzed around in his head as Zoë was actually considering a bar. "Yeah there's this great bar I know just round the corner that me and Maggie always go to" The thought of all the times she and Maggie had spent there, lit up her face, which wasn't gone unnoticed by Guy. "What is with you and Maggie anyway?" Guy inquired; deeply disappointed by all of his carefully planned scheme being flung away. "What?" Zoë was shocked by his question. Guy tried frantically to correct himself "I mean Chris and I were talking, but..." He realised he was just making it worse. "I'm sorry, I don't know what I meant by that!" This was a pointless conversation, and he wanted to end it as fast as possible. They were silent as they entered the bar that Maggie had entered just hours before, and in which she was now trying to kill herself with drink in. It was past eleven and Maggie had drunk a fair amount. She wasn't much of a drinker, so the alcohol was going straight to her head, not that she cared. She turned around, to see Zoë enter the room, the low light of the bar shimmering against her tall frame. She was glowing like an angel. For a moment she understood why she could never be with her, she was above her; she lived on a higher plane, far purer than Maggie felt herself able to comprehend. She shook her head and decided she had defiantly had drank too much now. She was seeing Zoë everywhere, and even worse, she was glowing. Maggie got up and tried to make her way to the ladies room to splash her face with cool water. Maggie stumbled from her stool by the bar, and fell into a clump on the floor. "MAGGIE" she heard her name being screamed across the room. Now she thought she heard Zoë, oh god you’re fucked. It's all in the brain, all in the brain. Zoë had seen her and came running to her side. "Maggie, what's going on? What's wrong?" Zoë clasped hold of Maggie's shoulders to help her up. Pulling her friend up to lean against her broad figure. "Zoë..." Maggie stammered, she squinted her eyes. "It's really you?" her face full of glow and joy. "It's okay Maggie I'm here now... don't worry about a thing." Zoë stood Maggie up holding her head up with one hand, and supporting the other around her waist. With all of the smaller woman’s weight pulling on her arms and shoulders, she headed towards the door. Guy gave Zoë a suspectful look, but Zoë chose to ignore it under the circumstances and glided past without another thought of Guy, or his lurid thoughts. He had after all been conversing with Chris. When Zoë found that Maggie was unable to walk more than ten paces from the bar on her own accord, she scooped her up in her arms like a child, holding her head close to her chest. Maggie's eyes fluttered open slightly as she gazed into Zoe's angelic blue eyes. Am I dreaming she thought to herself, she must be. The sensation of being held so close to the woman she loved so dearly, was drowning her senses, washing her away into a wave of pure bliss. She secretly wished the moment would never end, but also scowled herself for ruining the medic's date with Guy. She felt her body being put down on a soft cushion like surface, and Zoe's voice soft in her ear. "It's okay Maggie, you're going to be okay. We'll be a home in a minute." Zoë paid the cab driver and gently carried Maggie out who was now was half-asleep. Maggie had now unconsciously found Zoe's right breast to use as a pillow cradled within her strong arms. Aching a little by this point with Maggie's weight, which seemed to double with every second, but she had to be strong. Her friend needed her. The medic was still in confusion over was how and why this happened, and she secretly scowled herself, for a reason that she didn't really understand. Zoë laid Maggie down on to the bed with all her gentleness and care, and started unlacing Maggie's Doc Martins. She chuckled slightly at the thought of when they first met. She could see those red boots from the complete opposite side of the bar. They called out to her in all their loudness. She brushed away the soft hair from Maggie's eyes. Maggie always had this innocent look about her that intrigued Zoë from the start. As she pulled away, she felt Maggie move her hand onto her lap in protest. "It's okay… I'm here!" she assured while placing her hand on top of her friends. She laid her own head down next to her in exhaustion. The day's events running through her mind and her hand intertwined with Maggie's. She owed her friend so much she had given her so much. Someone to talk to and open up to, and most recently and importantly her freedom. What did she do to deserve such love and friendship? Maggie awoke with the sun piercing onto her eyes like needles. Her head felt like it had been run over by a seven four seven and her mouth was dry and coarse. She looked around the room to find Zoe's clothes and shoes scattered around, but there was no sign of Zoë herself. Then she heard a sound in the bathroom. There was water running so she must be in the shower. Thoughts of Zoë in the shower filled Maggie's mind, but she couldn't keep it up for long. She felt groggy and her mind was spinning in circles. Then Zoë unexpecantly ran out of the bathroom grabbed a towel and ran back in. Maggie was stunned, she just saw Zoë run past her naked, she must still be drunk, she thought. Zoë on the on the other hand in bathroom had just suddenly realised that Maggie was awake. Oh my god had she seen her, why didn't she think before walking out stark naked… Why was she feeling so weird about this? It was Maggie after all. "Zoë" Maggie called out, "Are you okay?" "Yeah" she gasped trying to catch her breath "I just didn't think that you were up yet that's all!" Oh god did she feel stupid. Maggie flew back on to the bed clenching the sheets tightly in her fists. Whoa she thought this must be my luckiest and worst week ever. An unmistakable smirk across her face, You're perverse you know that Maggie. Zoë on the other hand was still standing back against the bathroom door, gripping the towel, and thinking about how shy Maggie was about being naked. She remembered her hesitation in removing her towel when they had gone swimming. She tried to imagine how red Maggie must be in embarrassment by now, and her face glowed with (even to herself) a misunderstandable smile. Darlene came in without even knocking, and strode across the room leisurely. Maggie barely noticing until Darlene decided to scream in her ear. "Heyyyy!" "Huh?" Maggie opened her eyes to find a blurry vision of Darlene's curly black hair, completely missing out her face. "What happened to you?" Darlene asked as if she didn't already know. Chris had made it her number one priority to let the entire campus know that Zoë was seen cradling Maggie in her arms into the campus at twelve thirty the night before. "Well I think I had a couple too many drinks... and well I can't remember much else, but I remember being flown home by an angel." She wasn't quite sure that was right, but it was all that came to her mind. "Yeah well the entire Uni. Knows that that angel carried you and walked, and that the angel was none other than Zoë." Darlene couldn't believe the pure innocence of this woman sometimes. "What?" Maggie barely managed to whisper the words. "You know what else Mag's?" Darlene continued, "everyone knows." Maggie tried to think straight. "Everyone knows what?" she asked hoping for an answer that she wasn't expecting. "Yeah, what do they know?" Zoë interrupted entering the room. She had been listening from the bathroom and had heard every word that was said. Darlene stopped to think. "Give me a break guys… what I meant to say was that everyone thinks whatever Chris has told them," she was battling with her words. "And she's been saying what?" Zoë pressed in her questioning. "Well ... that you two are.... You know..." Zoë knew of Chris's nature, but she had to hear it, "No we don't, please Darlene just say it." "That you're a couple!" Darlene finished her face emotionless. "Well at least that's what they think that they know!” "Can we have a minute?” Zoë gave Darlene the look. Darlene gave a comforting smile at her friends, and left. Sensing the tears that were welling up in Maggie's heart, and her need for Zoe's warmth. She wished there were something she could do, but knew that this was something they had to sort out for themselves. Zoë turned to stare straight into Maggie's deep green eyes. 'Maggie, I don't care what anyone else thinks' she whispered holding her hand out for Maggie, which she gladly took. 'I only care about what is the truth and what you think!’ she tried to smile. The words shot through Maggie’s heart like a bullet, what was the truth? Could she keep that truth from Zoë any longer? There wasn't going to be another chance like this one. Just as she started gathering her courage… Guy stormed in "I really have to talk to you!’’ he glared at Maggie "ALONE!" Maggie understood and made her way out to Darlene's room, while grabbing a few clothes and things. "We'll talk about this later. Okay?" she whispered into Zoe's ear as she left. On her way down, she felt the stares of the other students; their eyes piercing through her skin like spikes. She was met at the end of the corridor by Darlene holding open the door to her room. Maggie entered quickly as an escape. It helped to know that Darlene was there for her. Darlene had come straight out about her sexuality from the start. Only a few people knew, but she was truthful about it to anyone who dared to ask her. Darlene had been with her girlfriend for as long as Maggie knew her, and it had never mattered to Maggie what sexuality she was. Deep in her personal thoughts Maggie had always thought of the psychologist as an Amazonian regent, she was well built with long dark curly locks of her hair to her waist and always stood with an awe of dignification that Maggie envied about her. Maggie and Darlene talked for almost an hour before Zoë arrived. At which point the psychologist decided to make herself scarce as they tried to talk once again. Maggie looked up at Zoë she looked amazingly pleased with herself, for such a situation. "What's so funny?" Maggie chuckled. "Nothing" Zoë looked away. "Guy and I decided to call it off." Her voice and tone was neutral, but it betrayed nothing of her emotions. The truth was that Guy had been more hassles than she wanted. Maggie was shocked and confused. "Are you okay?" she inquired. "Yeah, it was for the best... he never really trusted me and I didn't really like him that much. It was a disaster waiting to happen. I'm kinda glad that it's over, and anyway look what happens to you in one evening if I'm not there to make sure you get home okay!" Maggie knew that Zoë hurt some where, but she was trying to be strong again. She prayed that Zoe's relationship with Guy had not fallen apart solely because of her. Then remembered him standing Zoë up on their first date, which she was secretly reassured with. She had to try to say her feelings out again. She had to try again to tell Zoë how she felt. "Zoë I really have to tell you something" Zoë waited patiently giving Maggie the space she needed. " I've wanted to tell you for a while, but..." her words not finding their way to her mouth. Maybe she should do this slowly and bit by bit. Tell her you’re gay then if she looks shocked stop and if she's okay tell her you love her, that she's the first thing that you think of when you wake and the last when you lay your head down. She's the sun in you're day and the moon in your nights. You're gay... You're gay... You're gay.... You can say it You're gay... "Maggie?" Zoë whispered. "I'm gay!" Oh god she had said it, it was out, and there was no return now. She waited for a reaction from her friend. A smile came over Zoe's face. She didn't know what to say. She should have seen it. Things summarising in her head now, Maggie had never gone out with a single guy since she had known her, or even been closely interested in one, but she had assumed that she had never found the right man. Also how one time she had heard Maggie in the shower at a session of self-pleasure. She didn't think much of at the time since she too had indulged in the act herself on the odd occasion, but it was slowly coming together. "I kinda knew you were!" Zoë let out. Her features tightened into the centre of her face. She was actually lying she had no idea, but didn't want to make her friend feel awkward. "WHAT!" the bard shrieked nearly flying off of her seat in the shock "You what?" Maggie thought for a moment rationally, if Zoë had sort of known that she was gay, then it was clear that she had no intention of perusing a relationship with her. She had to silence her heart once again. It was just getting past one hill to find a mountain in front. Zoe's mind raced, had Maggie had a relationship with a woman? Was she in one now? ... No she would never hide something this big from her. "How could you have known?" Maggie stammered "I barely know.... I mean I've never really had anything… No one that meant anything… I just I don't know… It's kind of difficult to explain" "It's okay" Zoë stood up, a silent sigh of relief washed over her that she wasn't quite sure she understood herself. "C'mmon lets get some fresh air, I think you need some after your state last night" Zoë gestured towards the door, trying to lighten the mood. "Um Zoë," Maggie started getting up while grabbing her stuff. "Thanks." "For what?" "For being there for me last night... I kind of feel like this whole mess that Chris is stirring up is all my fault" Her face clearly apologetic. "If I hadn't decided to be such a jerk yesterday, none of this would have happened." "Shut up… okay?" Zoë turned to her friend. "You're such an idiot sometimes..." Maggie smiled slightly. "I know you love me really!" She joked. Zoë nodded her acceptance. "I'll be there for you any time you need me... and as far as this mess is concerned I don't care what anyone thinks, I know the truth and you've always been truthful with me. That is all that matters." Zoë always seemed to know what to say to make it all better, when Maggie hurt. Others found her to be rough and brief with her words, but with Maggie she was gentle and loving. The next couple of days passed as if they were months. Maggie was back in square one again, but this time she lived with the woman she loved, and as far as the entire Uni. was concerned they were a couple. They were the perfect couple charade, with just one thing missing... Zoë. Zoë on the other hand was still trying hard to figure out whom it was that had changed Maggie’s heart. They neve r talked about it again, but she noticed that Maggie spent a lot more time talking to Darlene. She understood how Darlene could help Maggie get to grips with her emotions since she was a psychology student and gay. If Maggie had a lover, it would be a mutual friend friend, she thought. Oh god why hadn't she thought of it already? She was so stupid. Maggie had fallen for Darlene. She decided she would talk to Darlene first thing the next morning. | |||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||
| |||||||||||||||||
|
This page has been visited
|
